1. Show up fully. This means being present both physically and mentally. Put your phone away, make eye contact, and give the other person your undivided attention.

2. Listen with curiosity. Ask open-ended questions and really listen to the answers. Don't just wait for your turn to talk.

3. Be present in the moment. Don't replay what's already been said or think about what you're going to say next. Just focus on the here and now.

4. Be empathetic. Try to see the world from the other person's perspective and understand their feelings.

5. Be non-judgmental. Don't try to fix the other person's problems or give them advice. Just listen to them and let them know that you're there for them.

6. Mirror the other person. This shows that you're paying attention and that you're interested in what they have to say.

7. Validate the other person's feelings. Let them know that their feelings are valid and that you understand them.

8. Be authentic. Be yourself and let the other person see the real you.

9. Be vulnerable. It takes courage to open up to someone, but it's essential for building trust and connection.

10. Be patient. It takes time to build deep and meaningful connections. Don't expect to become best friends with someone overnight.

Vengoechea argues that listening is a skill that can be learned and improved with practice. By following her advice, we can become better listeners and build stronger relationships with the people we care about.

Here are some additional tips from the book:

• Pay attention to the other person's body language.

• Ask clarifying questions.

• Don't interrupt.

• Be mindful of your own biases.

• Be respectful of the other person's time.

• Create a safe space for the other person to share.

• Follow up after the conversation.

Listening is a gift that we can give to others. When we listen with intention, we show the other person that we care about them and that we value their thoughts and feelings. We also create the space for true connection to happen.